We love training our students, who in their eagerness and enthusiasm want to help others be all they can be RIGHT NOW!! However, this enthusiasm is causing an error we would like you to avoid–using superlative words in positive statements, like everybody, all, always, everything, anything, etc.
You might ask “why is this a problem?” The answer is simple—the superlative statement can’t be true, the subconscious knows it and will eventually reject it. In your enthusiasm you may want to write and put in, “Everybody loves me”. But think about it—will everyone in the whole world love. NO!!
Other similar mistakes are, “I can do anything I want,” or “I can easily achieve my goals.” Can you? We are human and live in a challenging world. Some things may come easy, but not everything.
A more subtle aspect of superlative statements is to take a giant leap from one point of reference to another. For example, a client may have trust issues which limits them in forming relationships. You should not try to take a client from a position of having no trust to having total trust in one step. That is not safe for the client, nor are all people trustworthy; instead, try a statement like, “I am discerning who I can trust and how much.”
Another example is, “I will never be a good wife.” If you put in, “I am a great wife” it’s too big of a step. No one goes from never to great in the blink of an eye! It may be better to say, “I am choosing to discover and develop those qualities that make me a better wife.”
Why it is okay to use superlatives in negative statements but not positive ones?
Superlative words in negative statements are not a problem because all faulty core belief systems are faulty anyway. Faulty Core Belief Systems don’t work for people so using superlatives won’t matter.
All negative statements are deeply embedded in the client and you need to help them make the change to a more positive believe system., You need to give the client steps to take that are more realistic and doable.
Gwen and Leilani